Tantalize and Titillate Your Lover - How To Perform a Striptease?

The modern idea of stripping makes you think of strip clubs, strippers at bachelor parties, pole dancing, or lap dances. But the striptease has a long history, from burlesque and vaudeville — all the way back to the biblical story of Salome.

What is a striptease?

how to perform a striptease

Striptease requires slow, erotic dancing. The point is to get undressed. Whether planned or impromptu, it usually uses elements of coyness, like only partially uncovering breasts or genitalia at first or wearing extra layers to prolong the dance. ‌Aside from paid entertainment, you can bring stripteasing into your relationship as foreplay.

Some couples use roleplay, costumes, and props or might tie up the partner watching the dance to build anticipation. The dancer has freedom, but the watcher can't touch. Heightening excitement and drawing out the game makes sex fun, and stripteasing can develop your confidence in your beauty and power over your partner. Everybody wins. You are wondering how to perform a striptease? Read on!

Are there any rules about stripteasing?

A striptease is all about enjoyment. If you want to practice stripteasing by yourself, feel free! If you think your partner would find it sexy, go for it! Any gender or sexual orientation can do a striptease. All you need is a smile and some attitude. Your only limitation in the bedroom is your mindset, so bring on the sexy confidence. 

Dancing reduces stress and boosts endorphins so that a striptease can strengthen your mental health. Sex should make you feel good and provide a connection with your lover. A striptease can be freeing and powerful. 

Men can be just as sexy as women when performing a striptease. A man might choose a different outfit than a woman would, but sexy confidence, eye contact, and great music are all he needs for a super striptease. If you don't know where to begin with stripteasing, there are a few foolproof tips you can follow to bring seductive games to your beloved.

Setting the mood 

‌The mood for your striptease depends on you and your partner. You could send a sexy text or voicemail to your partner and leave them wondering what they're in for, or you could do a striptease on the spur of the moment.

‌Lighting creates a definite mood. You could dim the lights, use twinkle lights, or perform by candlelight. Candlelight is incredibly flattering if you feel shy about performing a striptease. (When using candles, be sure they're out of the way. If you plan to use scarves or a boa, make sure you won't bring them near a flame.)

setting the mood

Channel your inner diva and fashion a spotlight with a goosenecked lamp so you can dance on a makeshift stage. Don't worry about being a great dancer. Banish thoughts like that completely! A striptease should be a fun bit of foreplay with your lover, and your lover won't be critiquing your dance moves. 

You might conquer self-consciousness by creating a persona for your inner stripper so you can pretend to be someone else entirely. Let yourself go and arch your back, move your hips to the music, make eye contact, and strut like you're on a catwalk. You don't even have to dance if you combine these moves with plenty of attitudes.

Clothes and costumes 

‌The style of your tease is up to you. What's most important is confidence, whether you choose to be flirty and innocent, or you want to vamp it up for ultimate sex appeal. Your partner is sure to be excited if you're having fun and radiating confidence. A striptease can be incredibly freeing when you let yourself go.

striptease clothes

As to what you could wear, the sky's the limit. Remember that a great strip starts with layers of clothing — the tease is the point. Getting naked isn't the goal. The goal is to heighten your partner's desire to see you get naked. Using smiles, coy looks over a shoulder, or running your hands up your legs are all things you can use to add to the suspense. Remember that self-tanner will smooth out imperfections if you feel shy about your body. It isn't necessary, but if you think it will help your confidence, go for it!

You can wear anything you like, but high heels, stockings, and a garter belt are classic, sexy choices if you like wearing them. A shirt with buttons lets you prolong the action by undoing a button and continuing the dance a while before showing more. Beautiful lingerie that fits is essential. You don't want straps leaving marks on your bare skin. 

You can add elements to your outfit that don't bare any skin at all. Think of them as ways to get into the music and prolong the excitement of your striptease:

  • Scarves let you trail them or hide behind them.
  • Feather boas are always glamorous.
  • A long string of ‌‌‌beads can be part of the dance or tossed away.
  • Long, soft gloves will make you feel like a movie star.
  • Hair accessory — play the role of a ‌buttoned-up librarian shaking her tresses loose. You can add nerdy glasses, too!
  • Hats or sunglasses add intrigue.

Music makes it hotter.

The music you choose will make you feel sexy and can only add to your swagger. The best striptease songs have a great beat and sensual lyrics. It's up to you after that. You can dance to just one song or make a whole playlist so you can improvise a while and still have music during the main event.

Hip hop, rock, or Latin beats are popular choices. Whatever music makes you want to dance works. If you need inspiration, try these:

  • "Baby Got Back" by Sir Mix-a-Lot
  • ‌"My Neck, My Back" by Jhia
  • ‌"West Coast" by Lana Del Ray
  • ‌"Loca" by Shakira
  • ‌"Kiss" by Prince
  • ‌"Push It" by Salt-N-Pepa 
  • "Smooth" by Santana
  • ‌"Bailando" by Enrique Iglesias
  • ‌"Cherry Pie" by Warrant
  • ‌"Satisfaction" by the Rolling Stones
  • "‌Pour Some Sugar On Me" by Def Leppard
  • ‌"Girls, Girls, Girls" by Mötley Crüe

Tips and techniques

In case you still aren't sold on the striptease, try these ways to up your game:

  • A crop can be a sexy prop if you've restrained your lover for the striptease. Run it over your body slowly, or use it for light discipline if they try to touch the merchandise before it's time. 

  • Constant eye contact smiles, and sass will smooth over any self-confidence issues you have about dancing or exposing your body.

  • Remember the tease! The whole point is to leave your lover aching for more, so take your time.

  • Touch yourself as your lover would. It will let your sweetheart imagine what will happen later.

  • Listen to the beat. Whether you're genuinely dancing or just strutting around, staying in time with the music will make it look good.

  • If you enjoy fancy hair and makeup, use them as part of your persona.

  • Your striptease might end when your clothes are off, or maybe you want to leave heels and stockings on. You might dance naked for a while or lead your lover right to bed. The sky's the limit. You do you!

Reap the rewards 

A striptease is just one form of expression in your relationship, but its benefits might go beyond the time spent dancing. Erotic dancing can bring vital self-confidence and let your personality shine through. It can reinforce that your lover isn't there to judge you, and it's okay to explore new things together. 

If you've been with your partner a long time, a striptease can spice things up, bringing a sense of whimsy back into sex. It shows your partner you care about them when you put effort into seducing them, even if you've been together for decades. So explore your inner burlesque dancer and let the fun begin!


Striptease. Encyclopedia.

31 Tips to Boost Your Mental Health. Mental Health America.

How to Pull Off a Sexy Strip Tease Without Feeling Mortified. (January 2015) Women's Health

3 Reasons Why Orgasms Are Good For Your Mental Health. (July 2017) Well San Francisco.