All Aboard The Pegging Express: A Guide To Understanding What It Means to Peg Someone

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Sometimes, men like to let their female partners be in charge. One way to make it happen is through pegging — wearing a strap-on harness with a dildo to penetrate her male partner’s anus. Though the act has been around for who knows how long, the term “pegging” was created by readers of Dan Savage's sexy advice column Savage Love in 2001 to describe what had been showing up in porn since the 1970s. While anyone can enjoy backdoor pleasures with a strap-on, not all strap-on anal sex is pegging — the term generally only refers to a woman penetrating a man.

What Does It Mean to Peg Someone?

Why do people take part in pegging? Some people assume that there must be a power exchange involved in the act, and it’s often true — pegging is frequently an aspect of femdom (female dominant) play. It can feel cathartic, vulnerable, and intimate in a different way than traditional sex. However, pegging can also be an intimate act without power play. It can just be for fun and pleasure where both partners enjoy themselves.

Does pegging feel good? For many, the answer is yes. People with penises have an organ called the prostate in their anus which is sometimes referred to as the “male g-spot” or the “p-spot.” Stimulating it can bring them a lot of pleasure. One of the benefits of pegging is that it makes it easy to reach the prostate, especially when using curved dildos or toys designed specifically for prostate pleasure.

Many men report that the orgasms they get from pegging feel different than those they get from penetrating something. Some say they achieve more full-body orgasms — or even multiple orgasms.

Who Enjoys Pegging?

When it comes to pegging, the big question on many heterosexual men’s minds is what it means if they enjoy it. Is pegging gay? Not at all! Anyone, including straight men, can enjoy anal pleasure — it has no meaning at all for their sexual orientation. However, bi-curious men may also enjoy it as a way to experiment with what it might be like to be with a guy.

Do women like pegging, too? Absolutely! Some like it because it flips the script, giving them the chance to experience what it’s like to be the penetrating partner. Others love being in control of their partner’s pleasure.

How to Bring Up Pegging to Your Partner

A good way to bring up pegging to a partner is to start by asking what they think about it. Once you find out if they might be open to it or not, you can mention you might like to try it sometime. If they don't think they’re into it, then it's best to leave it alone.

If your partner is intrigued but nervous, take it slow. Do some research together on how to do it safely. You could also try watching some pegging videos together to see what it might be like.

What Toys Do You Need for Pegging?

Wondering how to peg? To start, you’ll need a strap-on harness. There are all different kinds of strap-on harnesses, leather, neoprene, fabric, and more. Research the different types and maybe try a few before settling on your favorite.

Next, you’ll need to choose your dildo. Dildos for pegging have a flared base to allow it to sit in the strap-on harness. Pegging newbies should start small. Later when you're feeling more experienced, you can level up.

It's also a good idea to get a few smaller anal toys like beads or plugs to help stretch out the anus prior to full-on penetration. Don't forget the lube as well!

Pegging Hygiene

Everyone should clean the outside of their anus with soap and water before pegging, but some people feel more comfortable giving themselves an enema before getting pegged, too. It may reduce the chances of getting the dildo dirty. However, some people find this makes their excrement watery and looser, making the chances of encountering fecal matter higher. Only you know your body and how it functions best.

If you do decide to give yourself an enema, make sure to use warm water, not hot. Lubricate the tip of the enema nozzle and make sure it’s fully clean to avoid spreading bacteria.

After anal penetration, you should always clean your toys with soap and water and wash your hands. Never cross-contaminate vaginas or penises with anything that's been inside of an anus. It can result in urinary tract infections, bacterial vaginosis, or other infections.

Techniques for Pegging and What to Expect

Wondering how to peg someone? Don’t force it. Warm up your partner’s anus with your fingers before going in with a dildo or other toy. Go slow and use plenty of lubrication — you can never have too much! After some firm pressure, the anus should slowly open up and accept the finger or toy. It may take several minutes, especially for newbies.

Contrary to what you might expect, someone on the receiving end of anal penetration can often speed things along by pushing out gently, as if pushing out a bowel movement. This relaxes the sphincter and may allow something to go in more easily.

Pegging can hurt, especially when a toy is inserted too quickly. A little discomfort is normal at first, but if it doesn't soon turn to pleasure, it's probably a good idea to stop. Any sharp pain is definitely a reason to end the session. You can lower the risk of painful pegging by going slow and communicating with your partner.

What About Poop?

If you're going to play with fire, you might get burned. If you're going to do ass play, you might encounter a little excrement. It happens, and it's no big deal. The most common time to see it is when you pull the dildo out at the end of a session.

If poop comes into play, put on nitrile or latex gloves and head to the bathroom. Use toilet tissue to remove the feces from the dildo and flush it down the toilet. Then remove the dildo from the harness carefully and immediately wash it with soap and water. While you’re washing your hands, your partner should wash their anus before you move on to any other sexy activities.

Ready to Peg?

If you’re dying to try pegging, just express your interest to your partner. Communication is key! Remember, an interest in pegging doesn't mean you are questioning your sexuality. Connecting with your partner and exploring each other’s pleasures are what it’s all about.

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Fetish Fantasy Series 10" Hollow Strap-on with Remote - Tan/Black | $109.99

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King Cock Strap on Harness with 7" Cock - Light | $71.99

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References

Peg, Pegging, Pegged. August 9, 2007. The Stranger.

Everything you need to know before trying pegging. February 25, 2019. Cosmopolitan.

6 Men Reveal Why They Love Getting Pegged During Sex. June 9, 2020. Men's Health.

Prostate Orgasm: What It Is. 2020. WebMD.

Does wanting to try “pegging” mean I'm gay? June 11, 2017. Sunday Times.

How to Suggest the Act Everyone's Talking About. Jan 26, 2016. Bustle.

7 Pegging Foreplay Tips Everyone Needs to Know. September 19, 2016. Cosmopolitan.

How Likely Are You to Poop During Anal Sex? September 15, 2020. Women's Health.

How to Prepare for Anal Sex, According to Actual Doctors. December 29, 2020. Self.